(Exercising Your Mind) This is a very personal account of MY CHRONIC NON-MEDICAL use of marijuana. It is the thief of MY dreams, and does not necessarily reflect the experiences of others. It is a Healing Anecdote mined from my observations and often times interviews with others to compare and contrast with my own experiences. Specifically, I will write about how it affects my ability to recall and interact with my dream experiences; in and out of sleep.

I have been experimenting with cannabis, also known as marijuana, for many years now. I took my first toke (smoke) when I was 17 years old. I am 34 years old now and you could easily calculate that I began puffing about 17-years ago. However, I have not consistently smoked for those 17 years and have actually only been smoking about one-third (1/3) of that time; abut five (5) or six (6) years.

The reason I have not been a consistent smoker of marijuana is due to various reasons. The main reason is that I can not tolerate a consistent schedule of smoking for very long. I have not been able to smoke cannabis consistently for more than one year.

One of the benefits to my experimental and scientifically inclined thought process, is that I have been able to observe the differences in my physical body and its performance, my psychological and emotional / spiritual experience. 

As I write this essay, once again free-form off the top of my head as I usually do, I am not smoking cannabis, as I am now in one of my “off-seasons” that I hope to extend. Marijuana is definitely habit-forming, and I would like to only use it for medicinal purposes when absolutely necessary. I have discovered that there are in fact many disturbing and unwanted side effects that accompany the very enjoyable high of smoking weed.

I definitely notice that my aerobic or lung capacity is inhibited. At first, my athletic performance increases and I even observe that, paradoxically, totally flying in the face of my original assumptions, that my exercise and stamina INCREASES! Probably because my heart rate and metabolism seem to be increased also. In the short term, marijuana seems to have cardio-respiratory and performance enhancement benefits. But that is short lived for one who smokes every day or more than once a day. With the chronic smoker as I often have been, the physical stamina and performance increases sharply drop off after a few days or a few weeks.

I also notice more throat and lung irritation, coughing and phlegm increases, along with lethargy (tiredness), fatigue and something like laziness. My mouth becomes more dry and I do not appreciate the odor on my breath.

PSYCHOLOGICAL / Emotional

When I first began smoking weed, and every-time I start again, one of the first things I experience is short-term memory loss. After a while, I begin misplacing things and out right losing things that are valuable or otherwise important to me. This can sometimes be very emotionally disturbing to me, especially when earlier this year I lost a heavy leather journal that was worth $50.00 that was filled with a large amount of original poetry, purchased from Barnes and Noble, and a $50.00 Mosaic Cross Pen I bought from Flax in Westwood. 

Another thing that is a bit draining to me mentally is that it becomes more difficult to wake up in the morning and then contributes to a stressful state when I find myself rushing to get to my appointments or other commitments.

SPIRITUAL / Emotional

I intentionally did not go too much into the physical experiences with cannabis because I wanted to primarily focus on and document the issues I have been having with my ability to recall and interact with my dreams and sleep-awake cycles.

Smoking marijuana for one-week or more for ME results in my not being able to remember my dreams. I am also a lucid dreamer and have been for as long as I can recall into my youngest years. Lucid dreaming to me has been not only the ability to remember my dreams, but also to consciously interact with my dream experiences, as well as to manipulate or change many different parts of the dream environment.

This is very spiritually and emotionally disturbing to me because I learn a lot about myself and the world I live in through my dreams. Having the ability to be a lucid dreamer has provided me with the opportunity to work out many emotional and spiritual challenges when I am not physically awake. It is like having extra time to resolve and develop myself constructively and positively without having to wear myself out physically to do so.

There are so many benefits to me, and by proxy, or as a result, positive benefits to others. This is not only personally, but academically, socially and professionally. I have published several other essays about my lucid dream experiences and the very desirable, positive results gained from these experiences and so I will not further elaborate here.

The physical, emotional and spiritual side-effects combined make for an over-all negative experience for me with CHRONIC MARIJUANA USE. I do believe that cannabis is one of the safest plant, drug, or psychoactive substance available for MEDICAL and RECREATIONAL use. I have found that if I decide to use marijuana sparingly or in moderation for nausea, headaches, insomnia, anxiety, stress and certain types of physical and emotional pain, it is an awesome herb to have on hand to alleviate these discomforts. 

I find cannabis to have far less negative effects in the short- and long-term than I have experienced with tobacco, alcohol, and even over-the-counter drugs like aspirin. Marijuana is certainly much safer on all levels, from my experience than ANY prescription pharmaceutical drug I have ever had the misfortune to be prescribed and the ignorance or desperation to use.

To conclude this writing, I believe it is very important to document another pit-fall or negative aspect of chronic, NON-MEDICAL CANNABIS USE. This is the very uncomfortable, physical, psychological, emotional and spiritual withdrawal experience I have had from an abrupt cessation, or stopping suddenly. I understand that this is due to the heavy chronic use I have participated in. It may not necessarily be similar to the experiences of others, although I have seen others going through this and they were not aware of what was happening.

It took me quite some time to notice these negative withdrawal symptoms and I only caught it because I am very mindful of my experiences because I enjoy living my life mindfully, observantly and scientifically. The following is not a full list of negative experiences by any means.

Physical withdrawal from chronic marijuana use for me has been very uncomfortable and includes: insomnia, nervous-tension, heavy sweating, loss of apatite, and nausea.

Psychological withdrawal from chronic cannabis use for me includes: inability to focus, misplaced agitation, suspicion, nervousness, insecure feelings and mis-judgement of situations and other people’s character.

Emotional withdrawal from chronic marijuana use for me includes: irritability, depression, intense bouts of crying, anger, despondency, severely unblocked social inhibition, manic behavior and mood-swings.

Spiritual withdrawal
from chronic cannabis use for me includes: partially or, usually completely restricted ability to experience dreams during sleep, hallucinations, delusions, schizoaffective behavior, paranoia and panic-attacks.

This is definitely not a very detailed account of my experiences with cannabis / marijuana. However, I do believe that my documenting and sharing my experiences through this “Healing Anecdote” will stimulate conversation as my many other essays have, and continue to do.

I will be sure to elaborate and provide more details about specific points from this essay in future projects as usual to grow and develop as we continue Exercising Our Minds.