Just because I want to help people does not mean I should be a Hypnotist, Life-Coach or Yoga Instructor. Especially because it is not appropriate for me to do so.
Certainly I possess a high level of skill in these areas and a great capacity for this work, while being very well received by my customers and clients.
But I must admit that it is something I have come to abhor.
Not hating the positive effects on the lives of others, but hating myself for doing it for money.
Even for something that I am so good at and even witness outstanding and remarkable results; it pales in comparison to the soul urge that I have to compose and create music.
I just refuse to live like most other people and I am through hiding in the closet and am ready to come out with who I truly am once and for all.
This is the Creative Non Fiction of it all. I have created my life the way it is and has been.
Now it is time for me to re-create it. Only this time more real. With Science Fiction. Imagine that.
When I realized that I found a business system and vehicle that would pay for my life-style without me being required to do anything that is considered work if I don’t want to; the game changed.
Depressed because it is somehow inherent within me to be weepingly sad; but more immediately because I felt like I have allowed too much time away from my real life.
I was living as a shadow of what I really am. A false image created by the God of me within.
Projected outward as the truth while being an all too pathetic lie.
You know, I’m done with this business of trying to be a healer or teacher in the zeitgeist sense. This is an unacceptable way for me to live. I will not do it. Not anymore.
I won’t pursue it at least.
It is well enough that I have people hunting me down to be their Hypnotist, Life-Coach and Yoga Instructor. That just happens all on its own so que sera, sera… whatever will be, will be with that.
I don’t even have to try to get that kind of work so why should I? Just leave it to those who really want to do it and it gives them great joy to do so. For me it is just hypocrisy.
Like a guy who started off in Science Fiction, Fantasy and Music who then became a healer, life coach or some other type of guru.
Maybe I just fell off the track altogether. Whatever the case, I feel something like ill when people give me accolades as a healer or teacher. I would rather they spit at me.
So I am going from the healer, teacher and guru side of the fence over to the science fiction, fantasy and music realm of boundless, eternal creativity and untapped potential.
If anyone is healed or learns anything from me, it will be best found through my artistic creations.
Sure I care to help others. But the way I have attempted to go about it has failed me. And therefore I have failed you all. But this failure is simply a carcass to be stepped upon and buried.
A stepping stone to something much greater withing me. A carcass that will feed and fertilize the soil of the garden of my subconscious mind.
Everything has suffered due to a lack of focus. I have settled for less in everything because I have tried to do everything.
The only place for the publications of such a delusional, mad-man as myself is in the realm of science fiction. So I need to retro-actively label everything as such soon enough…
And of course there is my acoustic guitar and voice. For without which I would truly be altogether in a grave. I must play and I must sing or suffer even greater insanity and oblivion.
Again, when I realized that I successfully created a business that would allow me the time and income freedom to not have to work; it completely transformed my thinking.
I always knew it was possible for me. But it did not quite take hold until I experienced the reality of it in my life and business transactions.
Many times in the world of personal and business development I have been encouraged to imagine the freedom I would have as the result of creating a successful and lucrative business.
The point was to free myself of the burden of the idea of doing work for money and instead to switch to the idea of doing work for the love of it.
What would I be doing if I never had to be concerned about my rent, my car, insurance, gas, electricity, food, clothes, travel and other life expenses because of financial independence?
And so, when that reality hit me square in the nuts, I got that painful feeling that something was wrong all around me. Something terribly evil…
Before this, I went to train as a fitness coach, martial artist, yogi, clinical hypnotist, metaphysical scientist and such; all so that I could be a part of the change for good. A cure for the sickness.
A sickness that infected the world and the Universe all about me. It needed to be healed or destroyed. To be burned away into everlasting fire.
All of the conspiracy theories, corrupt governments, bad doctors, alien invaders and spies were and still are all in my head. The sickness was really all of my own perceptions.
Well, I am glad you asked, let me tell you…
YES it makes me insane if I attempt to be a healer and teacher in the direct and conventional way.
NO it does not make me insane, so long as I stick to being an artist in music, science fiction and fantasy. This is the cure for Hakeem Alexander being crazy. To be myself.
This could be like some sort of schizophrenic’s press release I guess.
I realized that all along I was struggling to make a certain life work so that I could maybe eventually do what I really wanted to when I became successful: Music and Science Fiction Fantasy.
Yet I was doing these things all along and attempting to force them to be part of a world that was doomed to fall apart, crumble and die.
Letting go of this Hypnotist, Life-Coach & Yoga Instructor business has freed me to make my artistic developments all the more exceptional, outstanding and personally satisfying.
Killing me with it all. I was killing myself. It was a slow but all too certain suicide.
Instead I should be the killer of mediocrit
y by living as I choose; not as is chosen for me by the dictates of financial necessity in a land of hopeless, headless corpses.
Certainly I am a gladiator, but not in this so called real world. Another plane or planet perhaps.
Ask yourself what you would be doing with your time, your life and being if all of your concerns for money were no longer an issue.
What if you could do whatever you really wanted to do without the need to work for your money in the conventional way?
What if you could still greatly contribute to your family, friends, society and the world, earn a great income, maybe even be rich and wealthy without having a job that you dislike or hate?
And along with this you ALSO had the TIME freedom to be, have and do that which you love?
Compose a song to play, sing and just in time to make fantasy a reality…
I’m not fuckin’ around anymore. What about you?